31 December 2008

HAPPY NEW YEAR

I guess I did post in November. Howzabout that. Well this will count as my December post, just barely.

Hey, can you find the American hiding in this picture?

Swedes: "I must say chaps, this is a reasonably enjoyable night!" "Quite!" "Indubitably!" American: "I'M ON THE NIGHT TRAIN BITCHES! BOTTOMS UP! WHOOO WHOOO!!!"

What an American ass! I bet that douche doesn't even remember that picture being taken and then posted on the club's website for everyone in town to see. Dumbass! I'd like to say it's not as bad as it looks and they just took the funniest of several photos of us. I'd like to say that, but, ya know...

And on to updates...

-Haven't crashed my bike into anything and nothing has crashed into me yet... Surprisingly.

-I'm on what I like to call an "accidental personal hygiene shopping error" spree. First I bought this $5 (non-vibrating even) toothbrush cause the sign said it was on sale for like $2. Nope, the sign was for a different one even though it was right in front of the one I got. I was pissed. Then I brushed my teeth with it. To quote one of my favorite movies: "I don't know if it's worth five dollars, but it's pretty fucking good."
A few weeks later I bought this Gillette Fusion razor on accident cause from where it was behind the counter I thought it was the cheap one (it was really like $18 for the holder thingy and like 2 replacement heads, hey I'm legally blind okay?). It has like 5 blades on it, looks like a jet fighter and I'm pretty sure just placing it gently on the ground anywhere in Iraq would take out way more insurgents than I could with a tank. Anyway, I shaved with it and... extrapolate using previous quote.

-The company Christmas party was pretty cool. It was on this island in the archipelago, and we stayed overnight at the hotel. Since it was dark and most of the houses were deserted for the winter (i.e. no lights on) we couldn't really see much of the island. Good food, this weird singing group of 2 girls and some guy that were parodying Swedish songs and singers that I didn't really get, but it was still funny to me cause the singer dude was waaaayyy over the top (and I'm pretty sure drunk). Running around smacking everyone on the back like old pals, incorporating everyone who walked by to get to the food table into his act. It was entertaining. I sat in the one seat that was right next to them (didn't know they would be performing there) so the spotlight was on me the whole time and the dude was basically spitting in my food everytime he opened his mouth. Which was really often (he was singing). From what I've heard about company Christmas parties here, I thought people would get way drunker at the bar later than they did. Although one older guy who I really like (who reminds me of a big bald bearded teddy bear) did get pretty drunk, it was awesome. Good times.

-Swedish classes are on break till February. I'm much much better at reading now and I can almost follow most of some newspaper articles, if you can follow that. Especially if the article is about a beating, stabbing, murder, race riot, or car accident. And about every other day I can understand 90% of my favorite daily comic strip "Rocky". It's about an anthropomorphic dog, mouse, and frog who are friends and get drunk all the time and then occasionally go on dates with other (remarkably attractive) anthropomorphous cartoon animals of the opposite sex. Really that's about all that happens. Listening is still an exercise in concentration and luck (not to mention extremely frustrating and tiring). Speaking I would say is still at a 3 year old's level or so but with an adult, how shall I say, sensibility. For instance: "Me potty now." "I want food on dinner." "When shall we go at party later?" "How much for sucky sucky?" is about my level of discourse. And really if you think about it those are pretty much the only phrases one would ever need know in a foreign language... If I had to stop learning now. Oh, and trust me, everytime I learn a word that could even remotely be twisted into some kind of perverted meaning I do everything in my power to make Frida annoyed at my immaturity.

Gotta go for now. I have a feeling tonight will end up the exact opposite of the above picture, with me being the straight man and everyone else being crazy. Since it always happens that way. I believe I've mentioned my inability to synch up with everyone else's partying. Sigh.

Gott nytt år bitches!